I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
