Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize