dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize