Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
