Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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