Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
