You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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