i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
