Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
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