Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.