lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
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i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
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But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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