It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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