so that wasnt chicken after all
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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