it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
