Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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