i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
