I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
