is your mom at the bar?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
