last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize