I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I love you.
Bad choice
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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