do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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