So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
