I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
where does the pee come out of this thing
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
