He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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