So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
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