Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
