I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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