There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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