i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
