so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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