I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
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