who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
