$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
