so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Are we still banned from the library?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize