I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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