he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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