belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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