I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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