we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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