I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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