I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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