He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
