Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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