first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize
