"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
