It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
