I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
