Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
