so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
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She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
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I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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