I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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